Marathon Stickers

You've seen them, you just may not know it. They're on just about every third or fourth SUV (and sometimes on cars, as well) in the DC area. It's one of those white oval OBX-style stickers with a number in it, usually 13.1 or 26.2, which is how many miles long a half-marathon and a marathon are, respectively.

They come in several variations. Usually, the numbers are in Papyrus, which is a travesty on its own. Perhaps the saddest version of all:

Awww did somebody run a 5k? That's like meeting a guitarist that just figured out a blues scale.

When you see these stickers, it means a few things:

1. The driver of the SUV you're behind either ran, attempted to run, or makes you want to think he ran a marathon.
2. He wants you to think he's better than you because he ran a marathon and you didn't.
3. He's not afraid to brag about his marathon-ing, mostly due to the fact the he's a douchebag.

So you ran a marathon. Big fucking deal. I don't need to know about it. You're not better than me. I have better things to do with my time than to run around all the time. Complaining to the internet about people bragging about running around and taking pictures while I'm sitting in traffic are two activities that are better than running around like an idiot. Take that sticker and shove it.

A half iron man? I'm not impressed. The bike did most of the work.