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Friday, May 29, 2009

I Just Want a Fucking Cab

Miami sucks. After dinner we wanted a cab back to the hotel. There were 5 of us. There was a minivan taxi, so we went over to it. That cabbie made some excuse why he couldn't take us in his empty cab (in broken English, mind you).

I wondered aloud as we walked away from this moron and the other 2 cabbies who wouldn't take us "when did we enter Barbados?"

Then the next group of cabs kept asking why the van wouldn't take us. I got to the point where I was saying "I just want to go back to the hotel. There are 7 empty cabs here. Why is this so hard?"

The world would be a better place without Miami.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Opeth

Updated: Song list


Tonight is Opeth. I keep forgetting how many times I've seen them so I plan to figure it out right now:

1-2. Blackwater Park Tour: both times at Jaxx in 2001-2002
3-4. Deliverance Tour: once at Jaxx on 1/23/03 with Paradise Lost, one time at the Norva in 2003 with Lacuna Coil
5. Damnation Tour: Trocadero summer 2003 with Porcupine Tree
6. Lamentations DVD Tour 2004 (This had -- ugh -- DevilDriver and Moonspell on it)
7-8. Ghost Reveries Tour: 11/5/05 @ Jaxx, 2/17/06 at Recher
9.(I actually missed them on the Sounds of the Underground Tour.)
9. Wacken 2006
10. Progressive Nation 2008: 5/26/08 at DAR
11. Wacken 2008
12. Watershed Tour: 10/26/08 at Ram's Head
13. HammerFest 2009

If I didn't miss anything, tonight will be #14.

Songs I've seen live:
Under the Weeping Moon
Forest of October
Advent
Night and the Silent Water
April Ethereal
When
The Amen Corner
Demon of the Fall
Credence*
Karma
The Moor
Godhead's Lament
Benighted
Moonlapse Vertigo
Face of Melinda
Serenity Painted Death
White Cluster
Leper Affinity
Bleak
Harvest
The Drapery Falls
Blackwater Park
Still Day Beneath the Sun**
Wreath
Deliverance
A Fair Judgement
Master's Apprentices
Windowpane
In My Time of Need
Death Whispered a Lullaby
Closure
Hope Leaves
To Rid the Disease
Ending Credits
Weakness
Soldier of Fortune
Ghost of Perdition
The Baying of the Hounds
Hours of Wealth*
The Grand Conjuration
Heir Apparent
The Lotus Eater
Porcelain Heart*
Hessian Peel

*I may be wrong about these.
**Mikael played a snippet of it on the Damnation tour. Still counts!

Sources of actual dates:
http://www.opeth.com/, http://www.paradiselost.co.uk/

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The Junkies are Morons

Lighthouse of Alexandria
I unfortunately was listening to the Junkies this morning. They were playing some game with their callers where the caller would have to answer some sort of trivia question. One of the questions was "One of the 7 wonders of the world that isn't the pyramids is the Hanging Gardens of (blank)." None of them knew it.

That's not where they were stupid. I mean who actually knows all 7 wonders of the (ancient) world? (Great Pyramid of Giza, Lighthouse of Alexandria, Mausoleum of Maussollos, Temple of Artemis, Colossus of Rhodes, Statue of Zeus at Olympia, and Hanging Gardens of Babylon.)

The stupid part came when they tried to guess the others. One of them said "Mount Rushmore." Another of them said "no, because that's manmade."

WHAT?!

Apparently all the 7 Wonders were not manmade!!

Just another reason to not listen to the Junkies.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Washington Capitals & the Playoffs

Caps Eagle Thing
My prediction:

IF the Caps lose game 6 tonight or game 7, here is what I think will happen:

2006-2007: Caps do not make playoffs
2007-2008: Caps lose in Eastern Conference Quarter Finals
2008-2009: Caps lose in Eastern Conference Semi Finals
2009-2010: Caps lose in Eastern Conference Finals
2010-2011: Caps lose in Stanley Cup Finals
2011-2012: CAPS WIN STANLEY CUP!

This is obviously based on a linear projection. (And you'll notice that's a pretty big IF.)

Go Caps!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Saturday, May 9, 2009

High Fructose Corn Syrup

Ever see those Corn Refiners Association commercials where the one person offers the other something, but he refuses it because it has high fructose corn syrup (HFCS) in it, but the first guy essentially says, "so?"

Well, here's why HFCS and other corn products are bad:

It's killing you. It's killing the economy. It's killing the planet.

Note: I was going to sit down and write a long, drawn out post enumerating why corn is horrible, but why bother when this article does a pretty good job of summarizing it anyway?

I will leave you with this, though. You know who we have to blame for the corn subsidies? Nixon.

Friday, May 8, 2009

I will be the greatest president ever

Best president ever!


Here are some odd facts about 10 U.S. presidents.

My new hero is Andrew Jackson, who invited a bunch of prostitutes to the Christmas Ball because it would piss people off. He also liked to move outhouses around so people couldn't find them because Jackson was a dick!

I also like McKinley's style; when his epileptic wife had seizures at public events or dinners, he'd throw a handkerchief over her face and move right along with whatever was going on.

And I'll have fire tongs around every corner in my White House, so none of the secretaries can hassle me.

Best president ever!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Hat Tricks


I was at Game 2. Ovechkin got a hat trick. It was amazing. You can see about 1/4 of the hats thrown onto the ice in that picture up there.

From Puck Daddy:

Crosby, ever the competitor, had seen enough of the celebration, and skated to the referee as head gear hit the ice.

"People kept throwing hats. I was just asking if he could make an announcement to ask them to stop. The first wave came, and then I think they were all pretty much picked up, and more started coming," Crosby said after the game. "I just wanted to make sure that we kept kind of moving, kept the game going while we tried to get back into it. Wasn't complaining about anything."

He seems awfully quick to point out that he wasn't whining. (He was.)

Cindy Crysby Sidney Crosby also got a hat trick that night (on crappy rebound goals, mind you). When Crosby got his, a hilarious grand total of two (2) hats were thrown onto the ice, both from right behind the Penguins' bench.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

NHL on NBC sucks

NBC is broadcasting most of the 2009 Stanley Cup Playoff this year. During the season, all the Caps games are on Comcast Sports Net. The commentators on Comcast (Joe Beninati, Craig Laughlin, Al Koken) are fantastic. The NBC guys (who cares who they are?) are awful. They obviously know nothing about the Capitals except about Alexander Ovechkin, and worship any team the Caps are playing against.

During the Pittsburgh game yesterday, for example, Ovechkin's goal was replayed about 80 billion times, but Steckel's goal, which made Fleury (the Penguins' goalie) look like a blithering idiot, only once, right after it was done.

Later, Crosby made a desperate shot that was high and wide and never had a chance. The commentator said "what a fantastic shot!" NO! NO IT WASN'T! IT WAS TERRIBLE!



They also talked about how Ovechkin may be physical, but so is Cindy Crysby Sydney Crosby! Um, no, Crosby punches guys in the balls from behind.

Steckel's goal is 1 minute in. I suggest you watch it a few times.