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Thursday, September 30, 2010

Out of Context Lyrics!

I think Falconer is trying to sell me drugs....

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

What Should I Do Here Exactly?

Ah, Royal Farms. You never start to amaze me.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

So Close!

Monday, September 27, 2010

Friday, September 24, 2010

Signing a Credit Card

I was speaking to one of the less-than-smart members of humanity once about the importance of signing the back of a credit card. In theory, the signature on the back of your card should match the signature on the receipt. This way, people "can't" steal your card unless they can also forge your signature. But in reality, pretty much no one checks the back of the card. Plus, a lot of people don't bother so sign it (and who really cares anyway?).

I like to write SEE ID very noticably on the card. That way, the 1 in 50 cashiers who look at the back of the card will actually ask for my ID. If the card was stolen, the theif will no doubt say "I forgot my ID" and the cashier will process the transaction anyway. But nonetheless, I do make it a point to write SEE ID on the card.

When this logic was presented to the moron I mentioned in the first sentence up there, Captain Stupid responded with, "Oh, I just don't sign it. When they see there's no signature, they will ask for my ID."

Deep breath.

IF I WERE TO STEAL YOUR CARD THE FIRST THING I'M DOING IS SIGNING IT! If you don't sign your card, then whatever, but if you purposefully don't sign it because you think it makes it theft-proof, then you should just live on an island somewhere and don't bother anybody. You're obviously too stupid to function.

While we're on the subject, why do self checkouts at grocery stores force you to sign on that tablet thingy? It doesn't matter what you write. God has been buying my groceries for years now.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

The Same Fail Fails 3 Times, the Same Way

This angers me to no end. Whoever is making these obviously puts a significant amount of effort into making these fake Facebook update things, but has neglected to change the one specific mistake that irks me. I get madder every time I see these and this moron hasn't fixed it when he makes a new one. See if you can figure it out before I rant about it down below.




THE DAMN TIMESTAMPS ON THE COMMENTS ARE WRONG!!!!

The Titanic hit the iceberg 98 years ago but all the comments are in the last 2 hours?!

Galileo hypothesised 400 years ago but all the comments are in the last hour?!?1

The Asteroid hit the Earth 65 million years ago and the T-Rex only cared 35 MINUTES AGO?!?!? AHGHGGAHGAHGHGHGH!

>:(

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Violent Music Leads To Quadruple Murder!

Article: Aspiring Rapper Pleads Guilty To Killing 4 in VA

Another juicy article from the AP that can't wait to point out that this murderer listened to violent music.

An aspiring rapper in the "horrorcore" genre pleaded guilty Monday to killing his 16-year-old girlfriend, her parents and her friend days after the adults chaperoned the teens at a music festival featuring artists rhyming about raping, killing and mutilating people.

It's in the first paragraph!

The "journalist" doesn't squeeze anymore unnecessary connections to the violent music until much farther down in the article. Then, tucked pretty much out of sight, there's this gem:

Asked if McCroskey's musical interests had fueled his rage, Bowen said, "Much of that music is so rampant with this exact kind of behavior, you can't help but notice the coincidence. But I don't have a sense the music led to this kind of behavior."

The reporter doing the interview was trying to milk a soundbyte out of the attorney. Thankfully the murderer's attorney isn't a blithering idiot like most of our country.

It's really simple: murderers are batshit insane. It doesn't matter what they listen to or read. If you disagree, how about you force your kids to read something safe and nonviolent, like The Catcher in the Rye?

Monday, September 20, 2010

"Corn Sugar" Is Stupid

I'm sure you're aware the corn refiners are attempting to get "high fructose corn syrup" to legally be called "corn sugar". HFCS evil-doers are constantly trying to say that it's chemically the same as sugar. (Their own website even says, "It is not high in fructose as its name would suggest." It's almost like they forgot all the enzymes they had to add to their corn syrup to force all that fructose to be in there.) By their logic, diamond and graphite are chemically the same thing, too.

Have a look at this:

Refined Cane Sugar

Refined Beet Sugar

High Fructose Corn Syrup
HFCS ≠ sugar.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Smart T-Shirt is Stupid

Yes, I know it's been a while. I've been busy. Stop complaining. I have plenty of things in the pipeline, but no time to get them done.

Anyway, let's get on with this

A certain website is selling this tshirt that has some bogus math on it. Clearly it's intended for people who think they're smart. Quasi-nerds, I suppose.
The tshirt reads:
NO STUDY = FAIL
STUDY = NO FAIL

NO STUDY + STUDY = FAIL + NO FAIL
STUDY (NO + 1) = FAIL (NO + 1)
STUDY = FAIL
Haha. Clever indeed. But this assumes the elements in the equation are commutative. Many things are noncommutative. Subtraction, for instance. Also, matrix multiplication. As we know, STUDY does not equal FAIL. Sure it may once in a while, but not always.

The problem arises in the implied step:
NO STUDY + STUDY = FAIL + NO FAIL
NO STUDY + STUDY = NO FAIL + FAIL
STUDY (NO + 1) = FAIL (NO + 1)

Since STUDY does not equal FAIL, then the implied step can't be done.

So now how about you stop thinking about this and get back to work!