Shamrock Fest

Picture Ireland (cold, gray, and raining). Now picture several hundred/thousand of drunks like this:

Yes, that is a white guy, wearing a kilt (for some reason), and a hoodie that says "If you see da police, Warn-a-Brotha."

Okay, now only serve American beer, very very little of which has been colored green.

Next, make sure very little of the bands and vendors have anything to do with Ireland. The guy selling Welsh cookies was close. Oh, so close. Good cookies, though.

The things there that were indeed Irish-related were pretty sweet, but it was hardly a "Shamrock" Fest. Once you forget that it's supposed to be Irish it was a good time. As long as you have good company, that is.